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ANOTHER YEAR HAS COME AND GONE
During recent months, THE NA- TIONAL INQUIRER has been engaged in an extensive study of the aging process. The valid opi- nions of numerous experts in this field have produced astonishing conclusions and after innumerable man-hours and an undisclosed budget, we are proud to have discovered that WE TEND TO AGE EACH YEAR!!! In order to acquire this incredible piece of evidence, we posed the question "When do you know you are getting old?" to a knowledgeable panel.
Karen Stephens - "I would con- sider old as being 95!"
Laurie Maclean - "1 00! Because I don't know anyone that old, I won't be insulting anyone!"
Tanya Salter- "I consider 40 to be over the hill!"
Mr. J. Moore - "When I first got a ticket from a police officer younger than myself!"
Mr. Russell- 'I'll tell you when I get there!"
Amanda Knox- "I consider being 30 as old because _one is up AND
OVER the hill!"
Brad Weldon- "40 because all of my mom's friends are over 40!" Jasmin Ricketts- "I would say 50 because it is not likely that you're going to be bopping around too much. It depends on the individual. Look at Tina Turner and then look at my grandmother!"
Laurie Swinwood - "38 because your kids are fairly old and that would make me feel really old! It's only 2 years to 40 and that's REAL- LY old!"
Mr. Fischer - "When your knees tell you that a storm is coming!" Miss Meredith - "When someone walks in Mr. Hunwick's class and says to him, 'Hey, Sir, you used to teach my mother!"'
Mr. Wilkinson - "When a really cute female student walks up to me and says 'Gee, I wish you were my dad!"'
Marc Statters - "70 years old because then you've only got 30 years left 'til 100!"
Adam Millington - "30 because you start to settle down and you
don't do very much wild stuff!" Chris Pegelo- "I think old is about 40 and 1/4!"
Mr. Jones- "When I start to look in the mirror and I don't like what I see!"
Mrs. Chaudet - "When someone tells me that my socks are really wrinkled and I have to tell them that I don't have any on!"
The general concensus, how- ever, was that Jason Smith had the best idea - ''I don't consider any age old. Just live your life and don't worry about old age!"
THANK YOU FOR SPENDING THIS P AST YEAR WITH US. YOU REALLY ARE 'ONE OF A KIND'!